Dear Evangeline,
Many thanks for sending us the Whispering Lion 12-inch. Very inventive, very amusing but, unfortunately, falling between several stools. As in, there is no core audience that would immediately jump on this record. It's not hip hip enough for our hip-hoppers. It's not funky enough for our funkatoors. It's not pop enough for our radio stations.
Nevertheless, our ears are always open to one-off dance records. Please think of us again.
Yours sincerely,
Mr. Lindsay Wesker,
A&R Manager
A & M Records
London, England